Wellness Shop Musings & The Struggle to Fit In

I’m trying something new today, since I’m currently accompanying my wife on a work trip to Wilmington, NC. While I was on my lunch break, I took a stroll through the downtown and stumbled upon a cozy health and wellness shop. You know the kind: aromatherapy scents wafting through the air, shelves stocked with holistic remedies, and soothing music playing softly in the background. Now, I'll be honest, it's not the kind of place I typically gravitate towards.

But through the window, I could see a cozy little corner dedicated to loose-leaf teas and a juice bar, which was exactly what I was hoping to find.

As I ordered my tea (a Darjeeling blend), the shopkeeper asked me if I considered myself a health and wellness guru. My first thought was no—I eat way too many cookies for that! But then I thought about how much I love the gym, and eating leafy greens, and drinking tea or juice instead of coffee, alcohol or soda. So I said, “Maybe a little bit…but not really.”

And I found myself with a familiar feeling: that feeling of never quite fitting in. Back in school, I was a bit of an oddball. I loved swimming and playing basketball, but I wasn't quite competitive enough to be one of the jocks. I found solace in the fantastical worlds of books and spent my weekends participating in online RPG forums or playing Dungeons and Dragons with a few close friends, but I didn't enjoy a lot of classic Sci-Fi and Fantasy films to be accepted by the Sci-Fi club.

Then there were my theater classes, where I felt most at home. I thrived in the creativity and camaraderie of the theater, but I didn't share the same fervor for watching plays or belting out show tunes as my theater-loving friends did. It was like I was always on the outskirts, never fully embracing any one group or identity.

And you know what? That's okay. It's okay to belong to a group without conforming to every aspect of it. It's okay to be a little bit of everything and still be uniquely you. In fact, I think that's part of being human—we are social creatures that still have the ability to embrace our individuality and celebrate our differences.

And that’s especially true when it comes to the LGBTQ+ community. As someone who has navigated through various labels—from asexual to lesbian to nonbinary to trans man—I've come to realize that no single identity ever fit me perfectly. And you know what? That's okay too.

I’ve decided I’m going to stop being so afraid of labeling myself as part of a group if I don’t feel that I’m enough a part of that group.

Because identities are fluid, ever-evolving, and deeply personal. They're meant to help us connect with others and share a part of ourselves, but they shouldn't restrict us or confine us to rigid definitions. It's about finding the terms that resonate with us and embracing the journey of self-discovery along the way.

So, here's to embracing our uniqueness, celebrating our differences, and finding our own place in this beautifully diverse world. After all, it's the quirks and contradictions that make us who we are. Cheers to being wonderfully, authentically, unapologetically ourselves!